That's hot.

Take th candy love.

2008-07-24T00:00:00.006+08:00

Over at

Catch me if you can.

Matters to sort out.

2008-06-09T11:55:00.002+08:00

This week :
- Dinner nd catching ups with my girlf ltr this evening.
- Favourite boy's POP this early wednesday morning.
- Attending a wedding this Sunday at th church.
- Tanning with Jaslyn nd Syy on one of th weekdays.
- Gymming as nd when I like to.

Next week :
- Proj meeting on early Monday morning.
- Gymming again some of th days.
- Meet ups.
- & Maybe more proj meetings as well ?

& then you make me melt again.

2008-06-08T22:16:00.005+08:00

An extremely image-heavy-o-wordy update ! :D

Term test week ended quickly. My habit of 'being late nd taking cabs' can never be rid of. Business Finance was hardcore shitzxzx, Business Statistics was alright, MBS was terrible, Sociology was annoying nd HRM was a bummer. But whatever, won't think too much about th results yet. It's 2 weeks of break for me, cheers !

My three other classmates nd I got for Janice a strawberry shortcake birthday cake for her 18th. It was supposed to be a surprise, hahaha.

Snapshots with them, nd a sunflower for th girlfriend (:

Met up with Huiying, Xinying nd Soon Wee after th last ppr on Friday. We cabbed to town, but Xinying had to leave for work so it was only th three of us. Interesting talks, laughs nd walkabouts. FEP, DFS, Wisma nd Cine. Lunch over at Food Republic. Took prints with my pretty friend as well ! Will upload it when possible (:

Then we left for Clark Quay in th evening. Central mall has many nice high-end restaurants nd food outlets. Huiying introduced us to this dessert shop, GOBI. Disturbingly delightful please ! Haha.

She bought for us th 'FANTASY' creations, so very prettyyyy. Great for tea time snack. It's exquisite taste is overwhelming with sweet goodness. Sounds like I'm over-reacting uh ? Well, try it nd you'll know why. You'd savour every bite of it (;

Thnks girl, for th sweet treat ! I like.

Soon Wee nd I decided to have a late dinner over at Chinatown. There's this nice caucasian guy who sells german sausages yanno ? Hahaha. Had to take th long bus ride home.

Saturday afternoon with my mum at Great World City. Pepper Lunch, then caught Sex & th City. Major time sneaking into th theatre because security was strict with M18, but srsly worth it.

Shuttle bus down to CK Tangs, hate th crowds. Fell for th pair of blue Martina Pink's, but it was new arrivals (exxxx). Accompanied my mum to find her stuff but to no avail, nd I went home with no purchases too.

But aujhour-di certainly made up for it ! Morning call at 0800 from my favourite boy. I had to force myself out of bed. Breakfast came, McGriddles ain't that bad. I wouldn't mind having it every weekend !

& so we went out on a date like how we used to. Cabbed over to town, got me th floral dress I've been eyeing on, as well as a black high-waist shorts :D Awesomezxzx.

Cabbed again to Raffles Place, nd he brought me to Shokudo's for late lunch. It's like Marche, but japanese style. Great food nd service, makes a good impression.

Waffle dessert with toppings of ice-creams is a must try there ! My boy likes it. See th pink drink there ? There's th bubble inside ! & also stopped by Topman to get his tees (looks good) before rushing off in another cab back home. He had to get back to th campsite in th evening, while I was off for my famm dinner.

Dad drove us over to th eatery, grandma's birthday today. Ordered many dishes of chinese food, nd of course Shark's Fin Soup ! (:

I'VE BEEN STUFFING MYSELF SO MUCH, DIET FROM TMR ONWARDS.

Silly shopping craves.

2008-06-08T21:03:00.004+08:00

I SAW A LEATHER BAG, I FELL FOR IT.
& I MIGHT SAVE UP FOR IT.

YELLOW NAIL POLISH FOR HAR-PEE MOMENTS.

I WANT BRIGHT BELTS. LET'S GO NEON.

SO MANY PRETTY TOPS & DRESSES ! WOAHWOAHWOAH.

I LIKE THAT PAIR OF ONITSUKA TIGER SHOES ):
NO MOOLAHS.

MAYBE I SHOULD GET NEW LOAFERS FIRST.

ON ANOTHER NOTE.
I MISS TH SUPERMARKET & TH VARIETIES OF JUNKFOOD.

WHAT A LIST.

Ooh la la.

2008-06-07T09:22:00.003+08:00

Imma be out ltr in th afternoon with my mum. Do some shopping nd catch a movie (:

Waiting to meet up again soon.

2008-06-06T09:36:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY, SYY !

It's like a favourite ice-cream.

2008-06-05T10:24:00.002+08:00

Sweet.

No elaborations, it's you.

We're holding on to smth nobody else shall know about (:

Maybe because I.

2008-06-04T16:56:00.003+08:00

I'm not used to being by myself in th late afternoons, not knowing what to do, or who I can meet up with.

& when there's bucketful of tears in my eyes, I stop myself from crying because I've alr put on my best makeup nd I'll make sure I don't ruin it for th day. It would have been an awful sight. That's a good reason/excuse btw.

But then again, I'm alr at home. Quiet house, nobody's back yet.

I've got cravings for food again. Idk what's wrong with me. So I guess I'll be out to th mall to do some shopping at th supermarket ltr.

Update more when I've th mood.

For th sweet classmate.

2008-06-04T06:30:00.003+08:00

Catch me at my weakest.

2008-06-03T20:18:00.007+08:00

Nat's chill. Next's chill. Nat's chill. Next's chill.

Binging alot lately. I'm craving for maggi mee now. Peer pressure, academic stress. On th verge of giving up again.

But I really love this pack of chips to th maximum. Bought it at th bookshop yesterday evening, you should try it.

Went to th BSC room as well. They played different genres of music which was really interesting. Hahaha. There were Grease soundtracks nd Abba hits too. I never knew Afiq listens to old school nd disney songs. Little mermaid theme song in his ipod ? Super cute.

Met into Geraldine nd Fai on th way back home. Anw, Fai's band is aweeeesome, check it out :

www.myspace.com/9oclocksg

Did I mention that I got into my first choice elective ? :D Well, I certainly did. Marketing/Tourism & Leisure Business.

JE SUIS CONTENTE.

It's a strange feeling.

Hard to resist.

2008-06-01T23:56:00.006+08:00

Daddy cooked herbal chicken nd black pepper beef for lunch today ! :D I like.

My initial plan was supposedly to get down to study mode in th late afternoon. But mum was distracting me most of th time, coming into th room to tell me about GSS or asking me randoms. I got depressed. Wahlau wahlau ):

Immediate switch to shopping mood. Went for evening mass with her, bought some snacks from church for charity, nd walked over to Tamp mall's MNG after that.

Sales wasn't that appealing, I like th new arrivals ! I'm har-pee because she bought me th pretty polka-dotted top, a denim vest I've been eyeing on nd two basics spaghett.

So there you have it. Lol. A day out without books again.

Lock them out.

2008-06-01T09:20:00.004+08:00

Yesterday was nice because I had a date out for dinner at th japanese restaurant for buffet instead of gymming :D

& yes, I ate a tad too much more than I could handle. But I'm really contented with it. Haha !

My favourite boy got me my personal set of Stabilo's colour pencils ! It's not as good as those Faber Castell's (idk they're somewhere at home don't really bother) but I still like it.

TYVM, you got me killing mr mundane (:

4 pprs this week. I have to get started today as it's never too late to try. At least read up th notes or smth. Reckon I'll be doing badly though.

Indie lover.

2008-06-01T08:09:00.004+08:00

Mystery Jets : Young Love (featuring Laura Marling).

Deliberately chasing.

2008-05-30T23:48:00.002+08:00

Classes ended slightly before time, went to submit th MC for Wednesday's. Natasha was selling bites from Sugarloaf ! So I got myself th Roast Beef Sandwich (:

Met th others at BusinessPark, had our lunch nd al. Was supposed to do revision, but kept getting distracted most of th time. Soon Wee came as well, we went to walk about instead. Met into Amilia, Shahir, Guangming nd CK. Shahir's curry puff dropped because he was disturbed, nd many silly people kicked nd smashed it unintentionally. HAHAHA. So gross.

Had pancakes with them, yes I would like to have extra honey maple syrup please. & I don't understand why is there a need to pay a few cents for it.

Got a little too stressed up with everything. Went out of school to Bedok Reservoir for a short while. Afiq helped me to take this shot, nd I really really like it :D

Take a walk, take a puff, smile.

Rushed off to Tamp mall to meet my favourite girl. Got back th mp3 nd lecture notes which I left with her th other day. We were indecisive about dinner, but settled at Delifrance after some time. Shared th main course nd appetizer, not too bad.

Saw Cindy nd her boyf at th road junction so we literally ran to her. Hahaha. Despite th location we were standing at, three girlies together can still get pretty high. We were noisily talking randoms like nobody's business. Lol.

Then Shir's friend, Joshua came to find us at Macs. McFlurry's nd super crappy talks with her occasional "WOOS !".

I'm glad I had a lot of laughs to end off th week of school. I love you guys many many !

Paint me summer.

2008-05-29T22:46:00.003+08:00

Good evening, I'm your personal driver for today. Take a ride on my special service bus. Th arrival time to school is 'always late'. I think you should be able to get it (?) nd reject.

Anyway, this is my boss, or as what he said. & no, I don't look like an air sterwardess. Not at al. I srsly look damn gross. But whatever.

French test was pretty tough, nd after that, th girls decided to crash our lecture again. Giuliano made us watch youtube stuff. French ahbengs are cooliozxzx please. HAHA !

Went to Din Tai Fung for dinner with Huiying. We ordered our Xiao Long Baos, it's really nice ! :D

Then off to th supermarket to get our snacks. Imma get more another time. Look at my har-pee sack so far ! Spot th old school sweet there.

Ps. XINYING, WE LOVE YOU !

Hey sugar.

2008-05-28T23:52:00.006+08:00

HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY, BOON !

Spinning headaches, didn't attend for th test. Tutor kept calling me, I wouldn't answer. Hahaha eeks please. Soooo, cabbed to school for proj meeting regarding our roleplay for th HRM presentation.

An hour of MBS, then to th doctor's for MC. Used a bus back to school for another revision lecture after thinking twice. Tamp mall in th evening, met into other SLs. Accompanied Roy to find his belt, but to no avail. Bought myself a black skirt at G2000 though. I hate spending.

Presentation & French class test. I think tmr's gnna be fugly for me. Formal wear ? ):

Okay fine, I look awful everyday. Hahaha. Why oh why, school's like a fashion parade showcase. I'm so out of th scene.

Sidetracking. HAVE YOU VOTED ? :D

For Roy, Nicholas Lee, Suffian, Weilun, May & Yanti. Please do so at SAA Building, Cyber Centre yo.

A little smth in mind.

2008-05-28T23:26:00.003+08:00

No others could be better (;
My secret sunshine ♥

Tomorrow it'll be then, sweets.

2008-05-27T20:42:00.004+08:00

Lunch at BusinessPark with Huiying, Xinying, Soon Wee & Adam. I srsly love their company (:

We stayed there till evening having talks nd al. Snacking on junkfood makes me high. I've got so much more to bring to school yo !

Sociology class test tmr morningggg. Dreadful.

Reminder to self : Snapshots file is messy. Closet is very messy. Must take note nd do smth about it.

Caught between lines.

2008-05-27T04:38:00.005+08:00

I'm up early again. Falling back to bed after this.

Skipped school again yesterday. But I still went back for lunch with Jason. Tell me I'm so outta my mind. ABSURD !

Met into Cindy too. But girlf was busy with her proj so we cancelled plans. Caught up with Shir over at Tamp mall, we settled over at Starbucks. Never realised that Venti was a little too much, but whatever. Everything was good. Java Chip, our talks, shopping, dinner, you get th drift.

I have Business Statistics class test ltrrrr. & I need to do my tutorial work as well.

Warning letters are mailing in. My mum kept checking them idk why, but she certainly isn't pleased. I think I'd end up with non-graded passes for al of my modules. Fuck mannnn.

Sometimes, I really feel like breaking down.

Spray away, hide th mistakes.

2008-05-26T00:16:00.006+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY, WENJIE !

Rushing through proj report, last minute changes etc. Submission due today, we're still on it. Stressss please.

Get over with it.

2008-05-24T23:36:00.003+08:00

"You're a part-time lover and a full-time friend."

Words that bite.

2008-05-24T22:54:00.003+08:00

Th headaches got worse, so I went to th doctor's on Tuesday morning. Other than th MC, he prescribed for me 4 types of medicine. Like omg ?

Anw. I still went back to school for French lecture in th evening with th others, presuming there was a mock test as what Mdm Bich said. But no, there wasn't.

Th consecutive following days being late for classes nd taking cabs. HRM is such a rush, BOE is srsly a bore. Other students crashing into our Business Finance lecture, without thinking how squeezy th venue is. Janice nd I left during th break, had trouble sitting on th steps with a dress.

Facial appointment on Thursday afternoon, skipped French tutorial. Met up with Soon Wee nd Sammy back at school. Learnt some photoshopping skills from Huiying, I even got myself new fonts as well ! She was busy helping those BSC committees with their poster designs. Had our Ben&Jerry's ice-cream too. Walked over to th swimming complex at Engine School, then ate out with Adam after at Tamp's Macs (:

Banana nd pancakes for Friday's branch. Classes ended early so I went home to laze instead. Did a quick makeup nd off we go. Thnks to Soon Wee for th ride to Ikea ! We grabbed a bite, walked nd al before meeting th others at th cafe.

Dined with great company, so much laughters nd cam-whoring. Celebration for th two girls.

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY, VALERIE !
HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY, VIVIAN !

With love.

Sweet appeal.

2008-05-18T10:32:00.005+08:00

HAPPY HOTSOME 18TH BIRTHDAY, BRYAN !

Har-pee Sunday morning. PANADOL WORKS. I'm getting better I think :D

Unlike CCN Day, which I srsly felt so CHUI. Despite al that nd being late for classes again, th event was really enjoyable with such nice people.

Business School was th most happening ! Hahaha. Th mango sorbet at Johan's booth was awesome, flowers in high demands at Jingyi's, nd so was th manicure session at Shi Kai's. But we didn't get to do our nails.

Hard time finding ELMO ! He was supposedly having a break, lol. Don't we al love polaroid shots ?

Anw. Because th crowd was overwhelming, we settled at BusinessPark instead. Awkward stuff not to be elaborated, they should know why. Oh yes, girlf came down from TAS too (:

So we were having silly talks nd laughing at ourselves playing with helium balloons. Gives me giddy spells though. Rarhh.

Met up with Jason for a short while, before we headed back to th canteen to celebrate Suffian's birthday. He had a power ranger cake ! Haha.

HAPPY PRETTY 18TH BIRTHDAY, IAN !

SL appreciation dinner was not too bad, we were quite tired by then, legs aching nd al. Had to wait for th others so we took some random shots over at th mushroom area :D I like.

Lepak with them at th coffeeshop opposite school. Downside ? Being th only girl there. Games like '2 Words' & 'Question' were hilarious. Owned Roy ! Hahaha. Cabbed back with Afiq nd Johan after that.

Thnks for th prettyful rose, Huiying !
& I hope you guys don't mind those weird muffins. Lol.

Still Little Miss Late.

2008-05-17T11:40:00.004+08:00

I hate how my head is spinning so much, it makes me uncomfortable. Th sneezings have yet to subside, neither has th drowsiness. I'm sick ):

Random pass-bys. I question myself, why shun away ? Well, it's hard to explain.

& random thought. I've been wondering, why aren't we meeting up anymore ? It doesn't seem like th same as before. Th used-to-be.

Time for plan B.

2008-05-16T06:09:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 18TH, CHERYL !

Is anyone awake yet ? I've alr been up since 0437 in th morning nd I wish I could go back to sleep ! ): To no avail.

On another note, I'm promoting for a few CCN booth stalls located in Business School ! Don't know which booths to patron at ? Text or call me, I'll be there ! Find Jingyi, Shi Kai, Guangming, Soon Wee, Roti Boy, Alvin & Johan as well.

Getting al excited for ltr, but I'm having a terrible bad flu now. It's causing me drowsiness nd fatigue. What a perfect timing I must say.

Okay whatever it is, falsies nd eyeliner to th maximum ! ;D

Ps. I'd better make sure I get to class on time. Funny how I can get up wayyyy early, nd still miss my morning tutorial slots.

Sugar rush, sugar rush. Hot stuff :D

Making it through th rain.

2008-05-14T23:04:00.006+08:00

Had dinner at Din Tai Fung last night with Lucinda ! Our Beef Slices w/ Ramen was pretty alright. We love th Xiao Long Baos, ordered ten of it ! :D

Two hours of talks, really enjoyed her company. It's nice how primary schoolmates can have so much to catch up with. & how catching up makes us reminise those days. Haha.

Anw. Two days before, I missed my repeated module for th third time. Th doctor hesitated on giving me an MC, but somehow I got hold of it. Did I mention, cabbing to school almost everyday or buying my notes is terrible ! I'm broke alr ):

Th weather's so cold this morning. Late for Sociology, but was rather hilarious because we had to do roleplay for (-coughs) Manhunt. Lucinda, Malina nd I were supposed to be th 'supportive girlfriends' of th three guys. But it was srsly embarrassing, we just kept laughing instead ! Hahaha. Proj meeting with th girls, then lunch with Soon Wee at BusinessPark. Lecture after with Joshua (wong jie yang !) nd oh boy, I almost dozed off.

CCN Day this Friday. After classes I'm gnna be so free because we ain't got a booth. Lol. Supposed to patronise Shi Kai's nd Johan's stalls. There's SL appreciation dinner too. Let's meet up for some walkabout, dears !

Certain avoidance.

2008-05-14T22:05:00.003+08:00

Never realised how I've noticed back then, but left it like that. Don't know why.

An inspiration : "I think change is a good thing. Although it may be terrifying to get out of your comfort zone, it's also very exciting to start a new chapter of your life." - Kate Couric.

But I'm still quite shy nd awkward with life, though changes might be nice.

In th quiet night.

2008-05-13T02:28:00.005+08:00

HAHAHA. Oh my goodness, I have yet to catch a wink. Need to get started with my Business Statistics tutorial for tmr morning before going to bed.

SOON WEE I LOVE YOUR CAP. ED HARDYYYY. Look's pretty nice, don't you think so ? Haha. I would love to have it too. But even so, doubt I'd wear it to school.

To melt like marshmellows.

2008-05-12T23:58:00.003+08:00

Note to self : I must stop skipping classes.

Lunch with Jason at Design school. Proj meeting made me so confused. Janice helped me out. Tried to revise notes that I missed out on. Waited for hours because Cindy was still having her proj at TAS. Girlf's timetable clashes with mine, we only have Monday evenings to see each other. Met her at Tamp mall instead, had our talks nd al.

I miss those girls I used to be so close to. There isn't a need to say whom though. I'm like stopping in my tracks, not catching up with time. Friends ? It's alright, I'll be fine by myself I guess.

But thnk you favourite girl, for letting me know you'll be there for me anytime (:

Th undeniable subj.

2008-05-11T21:52:00.004+08:00

Maybe I took th wrong steps ? I made a mess out of th situation. I really didn't mean to hurt, but I alr did.

Those tears fell so easily. No control.

I'm srsly tired, physically nd emotionally. & still, idk what I want.

Happy Mothers' Day.

2008-05-11T13:56:00.007+08:00

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY TO NIC & ROY !

Hectic weekend. Couldn't make it for Roy's birthday party. Class chalet was alright, we had bbq nd late night talks till 6-7am. Th cramps are killing me though.

Back to school tomorrow. Effing don't know anything about Business Finance, no notes etc. Sheesh. I need some help badly.

Leave me a text, won't you ?

Shut th heartbeat.

2008-05-08T20:05:00.005+08:00

Still contemplating whether or not I should continue updating. What would you say ?

Well, some of my friends have been asking me regarding th temporary locked blog. Here's a few reasons behind it.

I don't really know who actually reads my stuff, or even bothers to. Anw. It's my personal life nd al, what's so interesting right ? Haha. Maybe because I've many awesome pictures ? Lollll. But that's so not true, you guys know it. Or is it because I'm always on foodhunt, nd th delicious treats are appealing to hungry people like you ! (: Or perhaps even because you want to see how or what Natalie's been up to. Is she okay ? Etc etc etc. Fyi, I'm still alright I suppose. Those people who dislike me must be fuming mad. They could be wishing I was dead or smth. It's not always that they get to see me in ugly situations. Hahaha.

Sometimes I'd get too tired nd lazy to update it. I'm no supergirl here ! My life's pretty mundane to a certain extent too.

& lately, there's been alot on my mind. I have yet to bring myself to blog about it. I think I'd rather keep it inside.

No beauty from her facade.

2008-05-05T00:08:00.003+08:00

Gotten to know a new hott friend this afternoon, he's really nice (:

Random talks with friends on msn till late. Had my laughs, happy pills, then back to my solitude.

Reality is so harsh, it's hitting me hard again nd again. So much of complicating frustrations. What. Is. Wrong. With. Me ? So many times I feel so helpless, nd I know nobody can pull me out of this.

It's our 11th mth, my dear boy.

See you after a week of training.

Sometimes idk where I'm turning to.

2008-05-03T15:42:00.004+08:00

I've had enough, I've had enough.

I've held back my emotions inside. But at some point of time, I've got th urge to scream back at you. Because you've been nagging at me so often, I can't tolerate no more.

You kept repeating words that agitates me. Fuck.

Why does everything seems so out of control now ? ):

Girlie, you know what I'm saying !

2008-05-02T18:59:00.013+08:00

Have to get back on updating on a regular basis, it's getting a little mundane. Can't remember what I've been up to, so I'll just blog about stuff that I still have in mind. Did I mention, I've got another bag ! Thnks to girlf, lollll.

Lunch at BistroWalk with classmates on Monday. A first try, not too bad. Had their Bacon nd Mushroom Pasta nd shared th Waffle Ice-cream with a friend.

Apr 29th spells BEN&JERRY'S FREE CONE DAY ! Such love.

Went to Whitesand's outlet for free ice-creams with my classmates. Met into Lydia nd Jayne at th queue as well. Had Chunkymunky ! (:

Took a cab back to school together for our evening lectures after that. Had discussions about th class chalet with th others at BusinessPark. It'll be a bbq stayover on th 9th to th 11th of May next week !

Proj meeting on Wednesday afternoon for HRM. Didn't really do much, but photocopied a stack of notes from th redspot books. Hahaha. Helped out at th BSC booth as well, selling pizzas nd drinks ! Pretty fun stuff.

Then Johan accompanied me to E!Hub, bought my new metallic bronze havainnas from NUM because th others weren't in stock yet. Why so exxxx ? Lol.

Train ride to Boon Lay to find my boyf. Oh boy, th journey was a tad too dreadful. But Billy Bombers made up for it ! Love th shakes there, Bailey's Irish Cream w/ vanilla ice-cream to th maximum :D

Cabbed back to Pasir Ris took 248901 years, practically zonked out on boyf's shoulder till we arrived at his place. I'm so glad to see his parents back from Italy ! & so nice of his mum to get me really beautiful gifts though it must have cost her euros.

That box is a huge chunk of strawberry nougat, what a treat ! Th rosary is made of rosewood, lovely sweet scent (I hope it doesn't fade off). Ndddd I love th pretty golden Guess necklace.

Thursday being a public holiday, we had BSG SLs gathering at Sentosa !

Went there in th late afternoon though, hard time finding an atm machine, waiting for coaches nd al. Th weather was blazing hot, perfect for tanning uh ? But I didn't luh, not for th time yet (;

Crowds everywhere. Hott stuffs. Volleyball. Falsies. Camwhore. Yes, took lots of snapshots (:

Huiying has a really pretty brolly ! Can you see it ? Haha. Check out her bohemian skirt too, I like.

Ck seems to fancy my shades uh ? Look, look at him !

Unfortunately, I had to leave early to send boyf off to his camp again. Missed out on dinner nd th birthday cake. Pretty girl will update me with photos though.

TGIF ! There's assignment for BOE, entrepreneurship business ideas again. Why oh why. French lec with Amilia nd Sammy (Jingyi crashed !) hahaha.

Sammy nd I sat at BusinessPark to people-watch. I've learnt new expressive terms from him. Sometimes he'll describe faces as CMI, "cannot make it". Other times it's "kena langah", or in worse situations it'll be LL, which means "lorry langah".

How mean right. But nevermind that, had a jolly time laughing at silly stuffs (: I think I've turned bisexual.

Scrambling every thoughts in mind.

2008-05-01T21:33:00.006+08:00

Does anyone have any idea what it means by feeling so frustrated, confused nd helpless ? I almost broke down today. Because idk why, but everything seems to get out of hand at times. Or maybe it's just me.

Sidetrack. Having to smile everyday nd persistently telling myself I'm alright even when I'm bothered with troubles is srsly tiring. I would rather let it al out. But that would be very selfish of me, not thinking about others.

I wish I could just fall out of it al. I wish a friend could guide me through. So I wish I could have a bestf. Then I would wish he/she wouldn't mind me ranting about stuff nd going out together often. & sometimes, I wish I hadn't known th truth about everything I'm keeping inside my little mind, because it still hurts. My heart goes weak.

A need for a warm hug nd a good cry.

Sugar candysticks.

2008-04-27T16:20:00.006+08:00

Business Day event on Friday afternoon. Went over for an hour, when ice-breaking games are alr over. Hahaha.

Dinner with th SLs at th CPF Building. Took up th seats at th back of th lower deck bus laughing nd playing on th way there. Hilarious jokes. 'Concentration' game. 'Truth&Truth' sessions until there were only 5 of us left at about 1.30am ? Lol.

Johan nd I walked back home together, thnks for accompanying me to th void deck ! Realised I had a few missed calls. Called boyf up after, nd he cabbed over to my house for stayover. Because he's in th army now, nd army guys are botak style, I couldn't help but laugh.

Daddy cooked lunch yesterday, Mui Fan ! & CP's BBQ Chicken Wings are srsly good, easy preparations for it too. You just have to pop them onto a plate nd heat them up in th microwave for 5 mins (; Fast uh ?

Anw. Boyf had to go home to change first, before we headed to E!Hub to check it out. DTE's Cathay is awesome. Now, lazy people like me won't have to travel al th way to town just to catch movies. Furthermore, met into Wahid, Chin Wee nd R'vind who are working at th ticketing booths :D

Th supermarket makes it convenient for those who are having chalets, because th stuff at Cheers are much more costly. Pastamania, Coffee Bean nd Superdog. NUM also has a store there, I can't wait to get my flipflops asap !

I think th cinema's th best entertainment in th entire shopping mall. So like we caught th guy's chic flick, Definitely, Maybe. Pretty nice, go watch it !

Ben&Jerry's waffle ice-cream is th love. Strawberry cheesecake nd Cookie Dough ! & do you know that free cone day is coming up soon ? Don't forget, spread th love yo.

C'est vrai, je t'aime.

2008-04-25T10:21:00.005+08:00

Had French yesterday. Oh my goodness, what a complicated language. Realised that Yeeboon nd I share th same christian name ! & I think my tutor finds me a headache, she keeps calling on me. Lecturer made us sing, Face a la mer. We thought it was pretty cool.

These few days I've been zonking off to sleep without revising my studies. Too tired I suppose. Here's more to th random stuff :

1. Th same questions I get, asking me if I'm malay, mixed or chinese. Why malay ? Th girls said it could be because of my eyeliner nd falsies. Th guys said it's because "where got chinese so pretty one" nd that I've "got the minah look".

2. & being told that "when a guy says u are pretty, just accept it" because "he can never be wrong".

3. Guy friends giving me their numbers saying, "text me if u want to". What if I don't ?

4. French makes me stress. So "maybe u can just learn malay la". I think I should too.

5. "Merci !"
"Je t'en prie"

"BONJOUR !"
"BONJOUR!"
"comment vas-tu ?"
"je vais bien"
"et toi ?"
"ca va (:"
"comment tu t'appelles ?"
"je m'appelle ck"
"enchante' !"
"enchantee !"
"mon prenom est natalie"
"je suis fatiguee"
"et toi ?"
"je suis fatigue aussi"
"tu es francais ?"
"non non non !"
"je suis singapourienne"
"tu es marie ?" (HAHAHA, he didn't know !)
"desolee !"
"da rien"
"tu vas ou demain ?"
"je vais a l ecole"

5. Yes I know right, a silly msn conversation.

6. Hello you ! Hello me !

7. How we miss sitting next to each other in class. Because school's so hectic nd different without used-to-be partners.

8. Love, please don't let your guards down.

Abhor make-up lectures/tutorials. It squeezes into my time. Can't I just don't go ? No, because it'd be hard for me to catch up with others. So an alternative, someone nice enough to help me out ? (:

Note : Stop being greedy nd stuffing myself with food ! I'm getting fatter, no doubt.

Poof, a click nd gone.

2008-04-23T21:57:00.004+08:00

FUCK.

I deleted several new snapshots from my hfone ): Another repeated mistake. Sheesh. I can't help it but, EFFING FUCK.

So here's to an image-free update tonight. Sorry about th crudeness, I don't like it too.

Checked out th different CCA booths in th afternoon with them. Met into many familiar faces everywhere. They gave out free coke zero drinks ! Quenches thirst.

Didn't attend evening lecture as well, had to accompany them to check out on th availabilities of chalets. Shahir got his Honda NSR ! Soon Wee got his Chevrolet ! So off we went on a ride to DTE.

Dropped by th supermarket at th mall as well, I think I looked so unglam. Anw, managed to get 3D2N at Costa Sands Resort through online-booking. Cheers to 1B05`07 !

It's a star, it's a plane, no it's supergirl !

2008-04-23T10:30:00.004+08:00

Note : I must not fall back to bed even when my alarm rings.

Didn't sleep well this morning. Cmi for morning slot ! So like. Lectures ltr from 2-6pm, hahaha. Supermarket after to get some stuff.

I just had my lunch, thnks to mummy who's at home still. Have to rush over to school now nd meet up with th others ! Update again at night then.

Oh boy, you so fly.

2008-04-23T02:52:00.007+08:00

Yes hello, I'm not really

1. th girl with massive eyeliner
2. pretty, with th thick eyeliner
3. pretty
4. hot
Or whatsoever I've been told of. Srsly speaking.

SCHOOL'S AWESOME ! Not.

Well, MBS is a subj that you'd find hard to focus well in lectures because Nair is a little too draggy on th slideshows. I could have dozed off, I tell you ! Didn't even have th notes printed out yet.

Nair Nair Nair (inside joke).

Appeal to add another CDS was successful after much consideration ! But ended up with Sociology, is that nice ? Haha. I realised I forgot to attend th evening's lecture. Tutorial's tmr morning.

Went to Cafe Cartel for get-together dinner with them after that.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMILIA !

Msn chats are so hilarious ! Roy. Mr Marciano. Rotiboy. Sw. Ivan. Jingyi. Vivian.

"sweet dreams are made of these"
"I HAVE THIS VERY NICE FRIEND CALLED NAT"
"MARCUS ROCKS !"

Talks about oreos, smelly people, laughters, relationships, money, issues, school, meetups, messages, happy pills, multi-tasking, secrets, etc.

Year 2 class.

2008-04-21T18:54:00.004+08:00

Back to school tmr ! I've been lazing at home today while friends are alr getting to know new classmates or attending lectures. Thursdays are dreadful. Mondays nd Fridays are of advantages.

Items checked :
- Prettyful notebooks
- Ringfiles
- Stationeries

- Jellybeans
- DS Lite
- MP3 player, Ipod
- Hfone
- Purse
- Bag

Appealing for another CDS for this semester nd two hours of lecture when I step back in. I'm eager to get my notes asap, nd I've promised not to skip lessons too. See th change ? :D

Dum dily dums dee lalala.

2008-04-20T23:46:00.003+08:00

Game rules:
A. People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves. Tag 8 people. Those who are tagged cannot refuse.
B. These 8 people must state who they were tagged by. You cannot tag the person who tagged you. Continue this game by sending this to 8 other people.

Well oh well. Shir says that I should do this interesting game if I'm bored, so why not ? (:

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Effing disappointed, so frustrated with him that I might end up getting too emotional nd perhaps, even give him a slap.

2. What will you do if you do not share the same feelings as the person who likes you?
I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings but I'd have to reject no matter what. He could be a really good friend anw.

3. What will your dream wedding be like?
Perfecto. It'll be held in th church with champagne nd pure white roses aligned down th aisles. My guy would be in his tux waiting for me, with his charming smile that melts my heart. I'll walk down with my daddy, looking beautiful with my gown, a bouquet of crimson roses grasp in one hand. Pairs of little children will be following behind, holding hands nd th girls scattering petals everywhere. Our parents look very pleased for us. Th exchange of custom-made 5 carat rings nd th sweetest kiss. Then comes th photoshoot at th park with our guests. Another event held at th hotel's grandroom, special menu catered to suit. Ending with a slow dance nd th cheers to th champagne glasses. Off we go th next morning, on our weeks of honeymoon straight after that, Paris nd Bali/Langkawi. Everyone wishes us true, blissful love for a lifetime. As said, it is a dream afterall. So why not exaggerate a little ?

4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
I think so.

5. What's your ideal lover like?
Someone who never fails to make me smile. Someone who does silly stuff to make me laugh. Someone who makes my heart flutter. Someone with th charming smile that melts like sugar. Someone who gets me excited on meetups. Someone who loves my makeups. Someone who looks good nd has fashion taste. Someone who doesn't mind paying for dates. Someone who gives in nd understands. Someone who cares nd wants to be my bestf. Someone who'd stick with me no matter what. Someone who wouldn't leave me for another. Someone who loves me, more than I do. Someone who loves to love too.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone else?
Being loved by someone else. & that someone I love to realise what he's missing (;

7. If the person you like does not accept you, would you continue to wait for them to change their feelings?
It depends. It's hard to decipher if they'd change anw. I'll have to move on after some time then.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
BF, bitch fit. HAHAHA ! Alright we'll still be friends, won't we ?

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy recently?
Definitely.

10. What do you want most in life?
Idk, really.

11. Is being tagged fun?
Yes, pretty much fun (for-understated-natalie).

12. If you find out that your best friend is going out with your boyfriend/girlfriend, how would you react ?

Insecurites. I wouldn't like them to be hanging out together (unless my bestf's a guy).

13. Who is currently the most important person to you?
God.

14. What kind of person do you think I am?

Shir's a really sweet girl, my favourite ! (But I think she could be very wild, just a guess hahaha.)

15. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?
Neither. But for now, attached nd manageable seems nice.

16. If the person you secretly like cannot recognize you, what would you do/how would you react?
Embarrased if I went over to say hi.

17. Would you give your all in a relationship?
I used to doubt it, but now I wouldn't mind. What's love without effort ? Whats the point of going into a relationship and not wanting to give your all? Then it either means I've got some doubts after some time or I'm just having a fling, my dear.

18. If you fall in love with two persons simultaneously, who would you pick?
I wouldn't pick any of th two. It might not be love, but a quick infatuation.

19. What type of friends do you like?
Pretty faces. Friends who love shopping nd hanging out. Sincere nd trustworthy ones who'd say it nd mean it that when I've fallen, they'll be there for me.

20. If you played a prank on someone, and he/she fell for the trick, what would you do?
I would laughhhh. But no hard feelings !

Tag:
Anyone. Or whoever that reads my blog then.

Hi, ni hao.

2008-04-19T23:35:00.006+08:00

Week zero orientation was alright. This year's intake has many new faces, good-looking ones especially. Met a few SAC juniors nd peers as well. Lina, Ck nd I were th 3 SLs guiding th class of 1B07.

Most of th girls thought that I was either mixed or malay. They were quite taken back when I told them I'm chinese (wo hui jiang hua yu). Idk, is that bad ? Haha.

Jam&Hop at night. (I know right, I can't freestyle ! Haha.) Ended abruptly at 10pm without mass dance, what a disappointment ):

&& CONGRATULATIONS BUSINESS SCHOOL !

For winning 4 out of th 5 awards this year :

Temasek Regatta 2008 Championship (3rd consecutive year)
Temasek Olympiad 2008 Championship
Best Spirited School Award
Freshmen Orientation Finale Overall Championship (4th consecutive year)

Our efforts paid off :D Hahaha. A hectic nd tiring experience.

Accompanied Cindy out for her shopping at Bugis in th late afternoon today. It was non-stop chitter chatter in th train. But everything's fine, NO GOSSIPS OR BITCHINGS, I like ! That's smth to note (:

Talks with girlf are sometimes random, but I love it like that. Nd you know how time passes so quickly when you're enjoying yourself ? Haha. We almost forgot to take a picture together until th very last minute.

Dinner was Pizza Hut's takeaways. After which, I lit th candles nd brought out th cake to th dining table. Yes ! It's my daddy's birthday today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY !

Chocolate mousse with crispy base, th kind that I really fancy because it taste like ferrero rocher. Sweet indulgence ! I think th chocolates looks great as edible decos !

Anw, timetable was out on Thursday morning. I'll be starting lessons this Tuesday. I've got French for CDS, can't wait for it ! On th sidetrack, couldn't find anyone that I know of who is in th same class as me. & Business Statistics for repeat module. Pretty awful feeling about it.

Scattered petals upon th lane.

2008-04-16T23:06:00.001+08:00

Three days before, boyf called to tell me that he managed an average timing for his 2.4km, nd did 13 pull-ups. Not too bad I suppose (:

Him : Haha I love you so much my dear ! You take care okay ? Eh you know today someone cried cos so stress that he can't march nd stop properly. Haha. So we're teaching him ltr.

Like omg ? Apparently it's one of his bunkmates. I thought that was srsly funny :D

& yesterday, he seemed to be a little insecure when I went out with my friends.

Him : I miss you so much ! How ? ): Baby, I really really love you ! Don't leave me k ?

A few hours before, we were on th line again ! Him telling me al th daily stuff nd how much he misses my hugs. (Awwww ? Haha.)

Silly Warrenny. Another 10 days time, I can't wait to see youuuu !

Ps. I'll be thinking of how you'd look like that day, especially being BOTAK ! Lollll. Oh boy, do I miss his hotttt hair.

Old school board games.

2008-04-16T13:04:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TO JINGYI & XIAOYING !

Met them at Dhouby Ghaut's TheMindCafe. It was Ladies' Night for Tuesdays ! Had fun playing games like 'Snorta!' & 'Taboo'. Th hilarious part was going 'Pok-keh' al th way, as if killing chickens. Hahaha.

Dinner time. Ordered Boat Quay Classic Fish n' Chips set meal, that comes with a Garden Salad, Cafe's Brownie w/ Ice-cream & Sparkling Peach drink.

So we gave th two girls a surprise cake, singing th birthday song, nd wala ! Making them do forfeits :D Giving slices of cake to each table, nd also serving to th manager, chef nd waiters ! Tried a bite from Sammy's plate though, nd it was pretty good actually.

Lots of laughters, snapshots, food nd great company. Definitely enjoyed th night out with them. Though I reached home past midnight, tired out.

Dull reflections.

2008-04-16T12:25:00.003+08:00

Hi. I'm searching for my bestf. I haven't got to see him/her yet. But come to think of it, maybe never.

Quick catching ups.

2008-04-14T16:43:00.006+08:00

Yesterday evening, I skipped church, nd went to visit mummy at SGH. Bought some really prettyful flowers for her too. Initial plan was to go ahead by myself, but daddy drove me nd ahkor there instead.

We were supposed to have dinner together, but somehow daddy told me he wanted to go somewhere else, while ahkor went off to meet his girlf. I was left at Outram station to get back by train, glad that I brought along th ipod. Oh wells.

Alighted at Tamp mall to get some food bites from ToriQ. & I'm so grateful to have my girlf who willingly came to meet me out when I texted her ! (:

Slacked at Macs having ice-creams, girl talks nd people-watching. Met into James as well. With nth else in mind, we walked to 201, laughing at our silly imaginations of having picnic at th field. Over to 24hour coffeeshop, for some reasons walking at th roadside nd getting honked by vehicles that zoomed past. Had supper from th indian stall, rojak nd prata ! Then to DTE while walking in th middle of th empty roads, spooking each other out with stories (hahaha). & we settled for breakfast at Macs again :D

So basically we did alot of walks, gossips, singing songs nd al. Exciting uh ? Love her company.

By th time I reached home, it was alr beyond 6am, still seemed awake. I zonked out only after an hour, how nice. Didn't feel too good this morning because of an awful tummy ache. Had to give th SL tea party a miss ): But I might be meeting them ltr for dinner !

Our connection through lyrics.

2008-04-13T12:55:00.005+08:00

Amusement : How it fits perfectly.

On th bus to th mall on Friday afternoon, I took out th ipod nd scrolled to th song 'I'm missing you' by Bobby Tinsley. Never chanced on it before, thought I'd listen to it. Here's goes.

Ohh babe.. Ohh babe..
Th nights are long, my days are cold.
Without th warmth you provide me when I hold.
You in my arms, feels so long ago.
When you were there..
I think a teardrop just fell down.

I really wanna come to see you.
I really really wish I could.
Maybe in a couple weeks, it’s only a couple weeks.
But even though I get to, it’s 14 days I gotta get through

(it’s too many days babe)
And I’m really really missing you.

And I miss, miss, miss.. I’m missing you.
And I don’t know.. How I’m gonna make it through.
But I gotta, gotta, stay strong for us two.
I’m a man, it’s a job that I gotta do.

So I go outside and I fake a smile.
But if they only knew, just how many miles.
Were between love so true.

I really couldn’t cope the way that we do (that we do)
And I’m really really missing you, you, you.

Baby when you’re near, all of my visions clear.
But like a magic show, I blink and then you disappear.
And I frequently, envision of it would be.
To have you alone with me.
Give me a moment so I can breathe.

Ok. I really wanna come to see you.

Baby I wish I could (wish I could)
Maybe in a couple weeks (It’s only two weeks)
It's only a couple weeks (but the problem is)
Even though I get to, it's 14 long days that I don’t have you

(it’s too many days babe)
And I'm really really missing you.

And I miss, miss, miss.. I’m really really missing you.
And I don't know (I don’t know).. How I'm gonna make it through.
But I gotta, gotta (gotta), stay strong for us two.
I'm a man, it's a job that I gotta do.

So I go outside and I fake a smile.
But if they only knew, just how many miles (how many miles)
Were between love so true.

I really couldn’t cope the way that we do (the way that we do)
And I’m really really missing you (missing you)

Cuz maybe one day babe, not too far away.
We can turn, all our dreams into memories

(not gonna be like this forever right ?)
Baby we'll have that home, stars stares, all that we share.
Too many nights, over the phone.

I really wanna come to see you (uhuh), baby you know I do.
Maybe in a couple weeks (I’ll try)

It's only a couple weeks (can’t promise)
But even though I get to, still don't wanna be away from you.
It’s too many days babe, and I’m really really missing you.

And I miss, miss, miss.. I miss you.
And I don’t know (I don’t know), how I’m gonna make it through.
But I gotta, gotta, hold strong for us two (strong for us two)
I’m a man, it’s a job that I gotta do.

So I go outside (I’ll go outside) and I fake a smile (I’ll fake a smile)
But if they only knew, just how many miles.
Were between love so true

I really couldn’t cope the way that we do.
And I’m really really missing you.

Bunny bunneye.

2008-04-12T21:38:00.005+08:00

Such chocolate chips are so irresistably good ! ♥

Just had a call from boyf, we caught up for 10mins. Then we got to text each other.

Him : I love you, so much (: I can totally see you when I close my eyes. Smiling back at me with that gorgeous face. Ah man ):
Me : I LOVE YOU MY BOY ! I've been thinking alot of you today. Remember to eat well, rest well, train well, nd no troubles ! (: misses.
Him : Yes love (: you eat well too okay ? BIG KISS !
Me : -MUAHHS ! xoxo.

Staying home on a Saturday afternoon.

2008-04-12T14:42:00.008+08:00

Made a huge portion of silly pasta for me nd my sister, though it's only th both of us at home. Reminds me of how Warren makes me his al-time favourite Carbonara Pasta, which I'm missing right now. At least it's so much better than mine.

His mom's off to Italy today, so I texted her last night nd received her reply this morning.

Me : Hello aunty sally ! Thnks for th many dinner treats we had. Have a safe trip over to italy, same goes for uncle henry. Do take care nd enjoy th time there (:
Her : U r most welcome. Do come over whenever u like. Just give gab a call.

I'm beaming with smiles inside, harpee harpee.

& Mummy's alr at th hospital this morning for her operation today, tells me not to worry. Shall do some housework ltr.

A favourite like ice-cream soda.

2008-04-11T23:20:00.005+08:00

Th smile on your face, lets me know that you need me.
There's a truth in your eyes, saying you'll never leave me.
Th touch of your hands, says you'll catch me, whenever I fall.

Out with boyf on Wednesday afternoon, nd we ended up at Vivocity for our picnic instead. Brought Don's Chicken Pie, Duck Porridge, Strawberry Pocky Sticks, Apple & Carrot Juice. Listening to 'Bop Bop Baby' on th ipod.

After which we walked around th mall, went to Daiso to get stickers nd drinks, nd also bought myself a nice notebook from Pageone. Trained down to Block85 for our dinner because he really likes th food there (:

Swensen's ice-cream treat for him on Thursday afternoon ! Chocopop cone is one of my favourite, nd boyf says it's nice too. Evidence : See th chocolate smudge on his lip ?

Dinner buffet at a nice japanese restaurant in Vivocity in th evening.

We had many servings of salmon sashimi nd beef, th alcoholic desserts were a pretty sight. Took quite a number of snapshots of th food but I'll just post a few.

Anw, stayed over at boyf's, did a facial mask for him before he went to sleep (hahaha). I couldn't get to sleep till about 6am, couldn't stop thinking nd tearing, which was pretty bad. But that night, th warmth of his hugs nd th pecks on my forehead reassured me.

Off to Jurong campsite this morning, bid our goodbyes. His parents drove me back, lazed around in his room nd used my laptop. Accessed into boyf's wardrobe, took one of his clothes as my possession for now (:

A few hours nd I was on my way home, surpressing al emotions. Met Cindy out to Tamp mall, everything was light-hearted, our talks nd al. Bought another notebook from Artbox, nd reserved a sketchbook which was OOS. Kelvin came after, so I had dinner with them as well. Hot Plate Noodles w/ Fried Fish !

Then chilled outside Han's having our milk teas, before a bus ride home.

An odd feeling now not having him around me. Only received two texts nd a short call today. A far cry from th times he always used to text or call me. Well, it isn't too bad luh ? I'll get to see him after two weeks, that's what I'm looking forward to.

Because I secretly envied how others can hold on to their relationship despite th distance nd time, nd th efforts to wait; I was thinking, why can't I ? & so I did. & Imysm my dear boy, thnks for letting me know you did too.

Runaway love, love.

2008-04-11T01:49:00.006+08:00

Getting late but I'm still wide awake, while he's alr sleeping so soundly on his bed (:

It's today. Friday morning, 0830 at Jurong campsite.

Army's snatching my boyf away for about 2 years. Our love's put to th test. It'll be a difficult period of time, but I'll just have to try. & no, I won't cry.

Because I'll be strong. (Won't I ?)

There's so much I would love to say to you, yet hard to express out in words. For being my lover, xoxo.

Dear God,
Please take good care of Warren when he is in th army.
Give him strength nd courage to get through tough times.
Guide him in darkness led by your light.
Protect him from any harm he'd encounter.
Even when there are obstacles to face;
tell him they're al blessings in disguise.
& by th time he surpassed th trainings.
Make sure he's al fit nd macho for a hunk.
I'd be a delighted girlf, heehee.
Thnk you !
Amen.

On another note, mummy's gnna have her operation next week. It worries me, makes me uneasy. Secretly, I'll pray that everything goes well, she'd be alright.

In our little imaginative twosome.

2008-04-10T15:59:00.011+08:00

Chalet stayover at Aranda from 4th Apr to 6th Apr with boyf nd his famm, despite frustrating cramps. Had bbq for two consecutive nights.

Lunch on Saturday afternoon at Xinwang HK Cafe.

Though it might not seem appealing, Pork Chop with Noodles In Papaya Soup is a must try ! Th desserts are definite not to be missing out as well.

Someone still owes me a treat from Waffle Factory uh ! (;

Lunch on Sunday afternoon at Suntec with them.

Liked th salad bar buffet, but th service there was really awful.

Went to church in th evening for mass. Boyf nd I used to have catechism classes in th library.

Two days of lazy afternoons over at his house. Movie marathons nd junkfood makes us harpee.

Ps. HAPPY 10TH MTHS, HUNN.

A random treat.

2008-04-09T09:58:00.001+08:00

Stuck in short time frame.

2008-04-06T11:31:00.007+08:00

Missed out on updates because of my schedule these few days.

Dinner date with boyf on Thursday evening, brought him over to Block85 ! We had Sugar Cane Juice, Chai Chee Pork&Eggs Porridge, Bbq Chicken Wings, Minced Pork Noodles nd Fried Oysters. Says that he enjoyed th food I introduced him to, so glad.

Then we rented dvds to watch at midnight for stayover, with waffles nd melted cheese to munch on. My DNA Says I Love You & Russian Dolls.

Branch on Friday afternoon, made ourselves a huge portion of fried rice :D Topped with a sunny side-up egg, it’s like a volcano eruption. Or that's how he put it as ? Lol.

Mum drove us over to Bugis in th evening evening to buy me th top I reserved from Topshop. Got my lenses as well. HAR-PEE daughter ! (:

Went to sister's school for SNGS Fest on Saturday, which was so crowded nd stuffy. Thnks to her for th $35 worth of coupons. A little late, but managed to patronize th food nd game stalls. Uncle Ringo makes me upset though.

Ps. my boy ! Try again some other time ! I'd really love if you're able to get me th bears. Hahaha.

Barbeque on Sunday evening at Cindy nd her boyf’s chalet at Coasta Sands.

It was nice knowing them guys, funny people. Haha. Enjoyed th food, company nd talks. Thnks girlf for inviting me over !

SL Camp from 31st Mar to 2nd Apr. Was assigned to empire MYRINE, nd Ryan was our FA.

Despite very little sleep, embarrassing moments, getting frustrated nd al, I’ve made new friends nd that’s smth worthwhile. Kudos to everyone who made th effort !

Btw. Huiying, thnks for th very pretty Disney keychain you’ve got for me ! Chan like it makk-makk (:

Thursday didn’t seem like an appropriate day to be out. Was too tired, needed to catch up on rest. Stayed home, slept till evening (except to wake up for lunch).

Dashing off to catch another sight of you.

2008-03-27T16:24:00.007+08:00

Going out with boyf ltr for dinner so here's to a quick update. Yes, we're still okay fyi. Sorted out th matter.

Anw. Tuesday late afternoon, he accompanied me to Bugis to collect my stuff. Bought a new floral dress as well. Everyone's after floral prints this summer/spring ):

Lunch over at Soup Spoon ! Love th Smoked Salmon Sandwich nd Beef Goulash we had. Takeaways of Korean Ricecakes nd Otah Prata too. Then headed to town to catch th movie, Vantage Point.

Met Cindy ytd for our date out ! We trained to town, had our late lunch at Subway. Girlf loves Cold Cut Trio alot uh ? Haha.

So like we walked around th malls, catching up with each other's lifes. Gossips, chats nd laughters. && snapshots ! Food hunt, dresses, rings nd prints. Remember to go out for more shoppings nd al alright ! (:

Evening was dinner at Bedok's Botak Jones with boyf nd company. It's my first time trying there :D Awesomely detailed informal menus, hahaha. So local.

Boyf's Double Beef Patty was nice. Cajun Chicken was pretty good as well. Th portion of th spicy fries is huge, nd you can even request for more, FOC ! In addition to that, if you think th food's not up to standard or liking, they'll actually serve another portion or even refund cash (worse come to worst). What more can you demand for ?

Shining drove us back after that. We went over to Pasir Ris park to chill nd cam-whore. Enjoyed th night out with them. Will update more with tonnes of pictures another time when I get them. Till then !

Subsequent late nights of thoughts.

2008-03-25T12:29:00.004+08:00

As I stare at th screen, I was thinking why a few hours ago I had not th courage to take th supp ppr. Felt queasy. Part of me felt awful as well, letting my friends down. I gave up even before trying.

3 in th morning but I still couldn't even sleep a wink. My eyes were hurting like fuck though I had a shower. Hanwen was online chatting with me, but th conversation ended after an hour or so. Back to square one.

Gnna busy myself with housework now. I want to go outside for sight-seeings. Bugis ltr in th late afternoon for some walks, to collect my alterations nd lenses. In th evening, diy hair dye.

Save water, keep bucketfuls of tears.

2008-03-25T01:12:00.006+08:00

Maybe, I need to sprinkle more sugar on myself. Because I have yet to reach my potential of being th sweet girlf he would want me to be.

& make a new promise of not being too sensitive or critical about stuff he says. (But that would actually have to depend, conditions that he takes effort not to make empty promises again or rant a big chunk of hurtful words at me.)

&& also, another note to self : Not to make words so vague otherwise others might misinterpret what I meant. Which in turn, would cause chaos.

Right now. I'd just need someone to accompany me at my side. Someone who wouldn't think me as insane, or of my emotional unstableness as bullshit.

Leo just came by with a hug to see if I was okay. He brought along my favourite junkfood which made me smile. I told him that my heart's pretty torn. He said that he could mend it up for me. I told him what went wrong. He said everything's going to be okay. I told him idk, maybe it's entirely my fault. He said that both are to blame for. I told him that he hung up on me abruptly. He said maybe he's tired or upset as well. I told him that my supp ppr's tmr but I haven't revised so most likely I can't get a pass. He said that I should at least try, nd there's always another chance. I told him that nobody's going to catch my tears. He said "Natalie, don't cry.. ?". I said I seldom heard those words for me. He said I'm a strong girl that's why.

Th guy who plays FM Static's Tonight on repeat in his ipod for me to listen to. He's my imaginary bestf.

For someone so sensitive, I'm pretty much a brave girl. Somehow such that when I talk nd sob at th same time, my voice becomes hoarse. So mannnn. You like ? Hahaha.

You make it hard to be faithful.

2008-03-24T20:50:00.006+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUANWEI DA GE !

Idk why. Can't seem to settle for a few hours revising for tmr's supp ppr. Srsly unproductive. I'll blog first.

Dinner at Vivocity with them on Sunday night. Boyf got my humptydumpty egg, sadly we couldn't get my favourite kinder surprises in time, nd so he bought me jellybeans from Candyempire ! (:

Salmon Fillet nd Sirloin Steak w/ Snail Sausage. Choccocino nd Hot Chocolate for beverages. Dessert was th Strawberry Custard Crepe w/ chocolate sauce ! Very nice.

Watched Th Kingdom (5 popcorns) in th famm car on th way back to their house. Stayed over for th night, shared korean noodles for this afternoon's lunch, then junkfood while watching th dvd, Ladykiller. Smth about greed.

See th mini meatballs ? Handmade by me ! Lollll. Btw, managed to purchase th wooden diy carousel alr ! It's time to fix it up soon. HAR-PEE :D

She's th girl I've been looking for.

2008-03-23T01:02:00.005+08:00

HAPPY EASTER ! :D

Aww. I forgot to buy my chocolate easter eggs ! But I've got my personal bunnyyyy. Guess who ? (:

& I found my happy pill, SUNSHINE ! xoxos.

"Hi babeh. I missed you !"
"You did ?!?!?"
"Hahaha."
"I've been missed ! Lol. You've been missed too !"
"I AM MISSED TOO ?!"
"YES !?!?!?!?!?!! HAHAHAHA."
"HAHAHA. That's good to hear."
"Are you happy? Lol. That's a very random qn."
"I'm not happy, I'm not sad. Pretty much in th middle. I like randoms. (:"
"Hahas. You do ? (:"
"Do u ?"
"I do. Do you ?"
"I do. We do."
"(: We're married."
"I thought so too ! That's sweet."

We are like mannequins, but with feelings.

2008-03-22T22:32:00.009+08:00

Went down to Bugis for some shopping. Bought th same hfone model but it's brown instead. Don't really know if I made th right choice. It's nice right ? Hahaha.

Swensens for brunch, ate lots of carbohydrates !

Esprit nd Topshop to get our stuffs. Mummy purchased my lenses in advance as well, I'm so har-pee. A year supply with no worries ! Then she went off with her friend so we took th train back. Shared th Prawn Rice Rolls for dinner at Whitesand's foodcourt.

Over to th arcade to play Bishi Bashi nd smth else, which was srsly cute ? But tiring. Doogie VS Momoka.

I can't feel th love. I can't even feel your sweet embrace. Sudden heartache. There's a need to fall in love again.

Smile ? Yes, please smile. I'm too emotional.

Play th record one more time.

2008-03-21T19:26:00.000+08:00

I just remembered smth. Didn't get to go to abang's private gig this evening, such a miss. Oh wells.

My mouth is dry with words I cannot verbalize.

2008-03-21T19:18:00.006+08:00

Church visiting on Thursday night, Good Friday mass with boyf earlier this afternoon. Met into Barbara ! Lunch at Kobayashi.

I've been eating junkfood at random times these few days. Peach mochis ! Pizza bar. Th late night suppers. Cravings are hard to resist like my boyf ):

Maybe I should start my supp revision now ? Lol.

Anw, please note that I've changed my email : natalie.erika@hotmail.com ! Removing unknowns nd twitty people. Not many seem to have realised despite my personal msg on msn.

With a red cherry on th top.

2008-03-19T22:21:00.004+08:00

& that's al I needed to know from you. Reassurance.
Thnk you hunn.

Anw. Back to MTV.com because I fancy shows like those. I'm so very addicted. A shot at love with Tila Tequila, Danni's hott stuff. I know right ? I need (repeat need) to catch up alot. Hahaha.

I missed out some episodes on Laguna Beach eons back then. Th Hills is waiting for me too. Etc etc. Gossip Girls, anyone ? (:

Catch a falling star nd put it in your pocket.

2008-03-19T18:05:00.006+08:00

Found out that it wasn't a teacher who texted me on revision lec's afternoon, but Guangming. Phew. So like, he nd Shahir flunked their pprs too. Lol. I'll see them next week for th supp examination then.

Business Statistics BLO1001
25 Mar 08 (Tue) 09:30 - 11:30
BS26-03-13/14 ; Seat 33

At al chance, never let it fade away.

It's nine in th afternoon.

2008-03-19T15:13:00.003+08:00

That's it. I've had enough of restrictions. Shan't be bothered about criticisms no more. If I keep shutting my thoughts inside my mind, I'd burst I tell you.

I srsly hate it when people assume stuff about me. It's my feelings you're messing around with alright ? It gets me agitated nd annoyed. How they say I always think too much or tripping over nothing. Too sensitive. Being emotional most of th time. They just don't get me do they ?

A long chunk of words. I suppose it didn't get through you al.

Effing fuck.

I deserve my respect.

2008-03-18T14:20:00.001+08:00

Affected by people's judgement nd gossips, I've to be cautious of what I have to say, not being too sensitive or serious over issues, which defeats th whole purpose of having a blog to rant about my personal life or take note of random events that happened. I just can't expose too much or show my pov on everything.

There's alot on my mind, nd putting it into words isn't as easy as it seems. I'd try to, but even so, some stuff would just be kept aside as secrets.

Birthday well-wishes.

2008-03-18T00:54:00.001+08:00

Yesterday.
HAPPY 17TH TO CLARISSA & TELLA !

Today.
HAPPY 18TH TO DENYSE & FEEBIE !

xoxo.

You must be tired because you've been running through my mind.

2008-03-17T20:22:00.010+08:00

Th house was measured up for value on Saturday morning. Everything looks really neat now I suppose. It's a definite that we're selling out. Oh well ):

Junkfood for lunch nd dinner over at boyf's place. Bewitched & Th Devel Wears Prada for dvds. Whipped up potato wedges, ebi tempuras nd pancakes topped with ice-cream nd apples !

Sarah's birthday bbq yesterday night at Costa Sands. Pretty much enjoyed ourselves. Her birthday cake was srsly good ! Pure chocolate layers with crisp base. It can either be described as heavenly or sinful. Hahaha. Okay, got hold of some snapshots from th surprise chalet. Played indian poker with absolut mix, hilarious time with such nice people ! :D

But boyf got drunk nd he puked ? Left at around 2am. Had to walk him al th way home from DTE, nd ended up staying over instead because I was so tired with giddy spells. Banana pancakes as breakfast for a change ! Sweet.

Today. Stuck at home on a Monday evening. Didn't attend revision lecture. Didn't meet up with my classmates at town. Didn't go for Scythia's bbq.

It's alr close to nine, haven't had my dinner. Boyf's gnna accompany me over at 24hour ltr !

Swing your hearts away.

2008-03-15T00:07:00.005+08:00

Met Jaslyn in th afternoon ! Talks. Talks. Talks. Trained down to Tanjong Pagar's Kelly Services while munching on my CottagePie's miniatures. Back to DTE, enquired th outlet for job vacancies, saw Garfield & Friends ! Then waffles from Waffle Factory.

Shir asked me out in th evening ! Favourite girl was pretty annoyed over some matters. If I were her, I'd get pretty frustrated too. We sat outside Starbucks, people watching nd thinking stuff. She brought me to Qiji for our dinner, I've never eaten there before. Hahaha. Had th Nasi Lemak.

Snapshots are never enough ! (:

Walked around th malls, who bothers why people were staring. Played at th top level atrium, exciting aye ! We got pretty high, sang silly songs, reminicing th good ol school days. Thinking about it makes me laugh.

Cindy, remember our chinese version for Pussycat Doll's Buttons ? Lollll.

Anw. Mum's trading in th spare N90, so I'll be stuck with some lkk hfone till she gets me another. Which is srsly terrible, as there's like no camera ? I doubt there's even th bluetooth fuction. Oh wells.

PS. I LOVE YOU SHIR ! HUGS & KISSES.
PS PS. BOYF, YOU KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET JEALOUS ALRIGHT (;

Got a pocket full of sunshine.

2008-03-14T00:46:00.003+08:00

Dear prettyful smile,

Enjoy your eighteenth birthday nd al ! Hugs (:

Another trend statement.

2008-03-13T22:31:00.006+08:00

Why. Is. It. That. So. Many. Are. Moving. Over. To. El-Jay ?

Friends. Communities. Privates. Publics. Entries with cuts nd are image-heavy, they amuse me. Okayyyy, add me over at natalierants so that I'm able to catch up on stuff.

Th stars will shine for you, yes you.

2008-03-13T19:10:00.007+08:00

Pitter patter. Sloshing my flipflops in th huge puddles of rain water. Flashing my Disney Princesses umbrella on th roads. Weather has been really awful these few days. It makes me annoyed ):

Gym sessions were cancelled. Junkfood nd takeaways almost everyday. Eat nd eat nd eat. Xinwang's HK Cafe for today's late lunch with boyf. We had Pork Chop Ramen, Eel Hot Pot Porridge, Har Gao, Gyoza Dumplings & Mango Snow Ice !

I know right ? It's such a cold day nd we're having ice dessert. Hahaha.

So like. Results were sent out via text yesterday afternoon. I'm utterly disappointed with myself. GPA below 2.0 with borderline grades. As predicted, I failed th Business Statistics ppr. Revison's on this Monday, supp date not yet announced.

Despite knowing that maybe I could have managed better, I think I srsly chose th wrong course.

Moolahs are such killjoys.

2008-03-12T06:00:00.009+08:00

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. As you can see, I'm still wide awake staring at my laptop screen.

Th file transfer to Ivan is taking too much time. Too much. It. Is. Incredibly. Slow. Well, there's like about 114,000KB left. Why so nice ? Lol.

Anw, sister bought Macs breakfast in th morning nd left mine beside my bed. Much love !

Ck asked me to th movies but dang, I am so broke. Money issues. I've been bored, broke nd bumped out. He wasn't too happy I suppose, said he hated me (rawrrrr).

On a lighter note, thnk you TRITONWUI for always letting me rant at you. Like how you remembered me ranting about having a birthday cake for my 17th last year. Although at times you can be such a mean person, I'm srsly very appreciative nd delighted to have you as my friend, just as much as how you're extremely ecstatic to have me as a friend ! Hahaha. So glad we remembered th cellphone story. I am waiting for my treat, mr ! Because I've been nice :D

Ps. Don't worry, you'll be able to find an awesomely stunning girl who'd be th right one for you. It's a matter of time !

Jaslyn says we'll find a job together tentatively this friday (: We'll see how it goes. I didn't forget our other plans for swimming nd tanning as well !

Chener says she missed me again. Aww, WE NEED TO MEET UP, TARTSY ! I can't wait alr. Lol.

& I can't remember who's Baoloon. It never occured to me that he would even bother to talk to me on msn. Whoopsies.

Another convo just popped up. OH. TIANZE IS ONLINE AT THIS HOUR. HAHAHA. I've got him to chat with then.

It still feels wrong, feels so right.

2008-03-11T19:16:00.011+08:00

Out with boyf yesterday afternoon.

Then we had this Mazazu japanese crepe at Suntec Mall. Assortments to choose from ! Makes me smile (:

Visited grandma at th hospital. Late dinner with th family after that. Claypot rice !

How people change in a short timeframe.
How bestfs can fall for each other, no one's to blame.
How unpredictable life can be.
Stuff like this makes me worry.
Can't be eradicated with just th delete key.

Mixed feelings.

Another environment for year two. I'll be moving house in a few mths or so. Somewhere that wouldn't be as nice. It's disappointing to have to face reality sometimes. Financial situation's gotten worse. Famm quarrels still th same. Relationship that is bound to be put to th test. Friends that come nd go. A phone line that they don't always call or text to. When I get so sensitive over everything. & everything seems so out of hand.

My friend tells me to "cheer up luh nat, don't think so much okay" because "that's life" nd "life'd be fun" ltr, so I should "concentrate on studying now".

Says that "its either you make it work good and be optimistic" or "you make it look bad and be pessimistic". I think I'd like th latter, though I'm very much like th other.

Alright then. SUNSHINE, that should be my happy pill. Tell me where I can find it.

Over to PostSecret now. I'm a hippie girllll.

Popcorn ratings.

2008-03-11T13:48:00.005+08:00

Been catching th movies lately. I am oh-so-har-pee ! :D

1. Ah Loong Pte Ltd

This was like wayyyy back last mth I think. A light-hearted local comedy without much expectations. Despite many negative criticisms it, Mark Lee's acting was hilarious ! Good laughs.

2. Th Leap Years

Every Febraury 29th ? Will he show ? Will she wait ? Keep chasing. Personally, I think it has a very good storyline nd feel, could srsly be th best local production. It reflects on one's perseverance for love. Th quotes in th different scenes ? Meaningful.

"It is not in th stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves"
"It's better to be loved then lost, than not being loved at all"
"You're everything that I've dream of and everything that was wrong"
"In three words, I can sum up everything I've learnt about life : it goes on"

& I like th music too. Tearing nd getting al emotional. Another heartwarming nd romantic movie that is comparable to PS. I Love You. Highly recommended !

3. 10,000 BC

Evolet has really captivating, pretty blue eyes that sparkles. Love th visual effects that made it al seem so realistic. Except for th dialouges nd parts of th script. Why don't they use native languages ? & th anti-climax was when D'Leh threw th spear at th huge figure they acknowledged as a god, nd that's how he killed him ? What a flip !

"You are just a little boy."
"Tell them I am older than I look."

Somehow or rather, like Apocalypto, but can't meet up to that standard. Moderate impact.

4. Step up 2: Th Streets

Only scores for th absolutely gorgeous dance moves. Other than that, th movie is pretty boring. Even before you watch it, you'll be able to depict that th ending would be another happily-ever-after, whereby Chase nd Andie falls in love.

I still prefer Channing Tatum. He. Is. So. Hotttt.

Ps. Anyone has th DVD for Honey ?

Other upcoming movies I wouldn't want to miss :

1. Away From Her
2. Secret Sunshine (13 Mar)
3. Virgin Territory (27 Mar)
4. Cassandra's Dream (3rd Apr)
5. The Other Boleyn Girl (3rd Apr)
6. Definitely, Maybe (1o Apr)
7. How She Move (17 Apr)
8. Over Her Dead Body (8th May)
9. Sex And The City: The Movie (29th May)
10. Penelope (19th June)
11. The Mummy 3: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor (24th July)
12. Mamma Mia! (18th September)

Everyone of us are heartbreakers.

2008-03-07T21:09:00.009+08:00

Back home, after 3D2N stay at Costa Sands Resort ! Snapshots would be able to interpret what we've been up to for these few days.

Ben&Jerry's after dinner on th first night. Two scoops in a chocolate waffle cone, how sinful ! Haha.

Had a huge tiff yesterday morning, went on our seperate afternoon, but everything's alright after. We trained over to Suntec in th evening, wanted to catch a movie but to no avail. So we went to have some fancy eggtarts, really nice bites.

He brought me to Crystal Jade because I've always wanted to ! I know I'm missing out on such good dimsums. Like omgggg. We indulged in a few delicacies. My favourite would be th Chicken & Mushroom Soup Dumplings, nd of course th Little Dragon Dumplings (Xiao Long Bao) :D I really like those !

Went back to th chalet for our little supper after Carrefour (this is why I can't go on a diet ?). Didn't drink up al th beers nd alcohols because we were too full from th junkfood nd dinner. Hahaha.

Checked-out in th afternoon today, gymmed together at Aranda Country Club again (will be heading there often !) nd suana after that. Korean cuisine at th food court for lunch, I'm so glad he likes it too. Waffle factory was not that bad as well, sweet-tooths. Then I had a surprise, why thnk you for th pretty bag I've been eyeing on (:

Heart-to-heart talks, no matter how hard or awkward it may seem. I've been trying to accept it alr. There are times then, that thoughts run through my mind constantly about them. But I can srsly say that it's time I'd let those horrible stuff be left aside, we'll move on from insecurities nd hurt. As long as we don't reminise back, I'll be able to promise you that. You should know. We're able to hold on to our relationship because we made it work out. Being appreciated.

Thnk you, I've found love. Thnk God, I found you.

But I've heartbreaks too many a time.

No more empty promises.

2008-03-05T11:53:00.005+08:00

"Yes Natalie. My love for you is fading."

Yes, my boyf said that. I've lost my Warren, th one who never fails to make me smile.

Th last thing I knew I was crying so hard, it hurts. Inflicted pain. I needed someone. I cried for Chener. Cried for Shirleen. But somehow they weren't there. Again, I realised I don't have my hfone. I'm so thnkful I've got other friends to talk to though. Huiying. Jaslyn. Dominic. Caught by random surprises, I was srsly glad for their concern.

But at 12.30am, he came up to my house nd apologised. He read my letter, took his presents nd then gave me a hug. Said I've never changed, it was just him. Said that my Warren is back, th one who never fails to make me smile. I had doubts, nd I knew he went for a few puffs. It made my heart ache, why. do. such. silly. stuffs. to. get. back. at. me ? I wanted to hate him for that. Idk.

He promised never to make my tears fall again. Never to hurt me. Never to shout or hurl vulgarities at me. Promised that he'll make me trust him again, no matter what it takes.

This is th third time I'm forgiving him. Hunn, remember : No more empty promises. Ilysm.

HAPPY 9TH MONTHS.

Ps. Everything should be alright now uh ? I know you love th prata we cooked yesterday night.

A little more appreciation.

2008-03-04T21:38:00.006+08:00

Life hasn't been going smooth lately.

I lost my hfone yesterday night. We wanted to eat at block85, went al th way there, but it was closed for two days. My mum isn't too happy when I called, telling her to cancel my line. Well, her birthday's today btw.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY.
You know I love you no matter what.

Boyf nd I quarrelled alot too. So like he couldnt tolerate anymore, he left. Tears fall, I went out of th house for walks. Wanting to call someone. But I realised I don't have my hfone. Why that's nice.

Haven't found a job for th break. Maybe I'll try again another time. Anyone ?

It's not a big deal uh. Others wouldn't want to know sad stuff. Don't worry, I'm alright (: I'm so happy because I haven't talked much alr. By my own, I'm a bestf.

I've skipped dinner for two nights alr. No appetite.

Teardrops On My Guitar - Taylor Swift

2008-03-03T18:57:00.002+08:00

Edited

Boy, he looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

Boy, he talks to me, I laugh cause it's so damn funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

[Chorus:]

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

Boy, he walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

[Repeat Chorus]

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into..

Boy, he looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.

I fake a smile so he won't see.

2008-03-03T15:20:00.003+08:00

Idk who'd bother reading this personal entry. If you do, please tell him so. Shir. Chener. Abby. Sarah. Whoever (funny thing there's no guy's name).

Sorry for not being able to be th perfect girlf. I know I get so out of control at times. Trust me, I'm not insane. I'm not mad. No matter how many times you told your friends that, nd you don't know how hurtful it is. I'm just sensitive.

Told you I find it difficult to talk, forcing words makes me feel awkward. It's hard to not be upset over th past mistakes. To not be upset that I'm never going to be good enough. There'll be this unexplainable feeling you'd have towards those exs. No denial. To not be upset, that those little words you said to me weren't special. Because you told those same lines to them nd other girls as well.

But thnk you for always trying to give th best to me. Maybe I took everything we had for granted sometimes. But I do reflect back, nd I'd realise my mistakes nd try to make things work out better. But no, I suppose you didn't think so uh.

My wrong for sneaking into your chat logs just now. I've come to know why some says ignorance, sometimes is a bliss. Knowing too much might not be good, but on th other hand it tells th trust you put in me. Oh well. You must be really happy now. You've managed to make my heart ache, my tears fall. Why thnk you once again, I still love you.

"I'm afraid to talk about my love because someone else's would be much better." - Post Secrets.

Hunn, I'm with you. Even though I might not show it. Ask me questions, I'll definitely tell you more now. You're still sleeping, laughing in your dreams somehow (nd I even threw th pillow at your face). There I am beside you crying, not disturbing our lazy afternoon. With love, Natalie.

Okay you woked up alr.

Some self-timer shots.

2008-03-01T13:28:00.010+08:00

I'd get up in th morning, look at myself in th mirror, not a pretty sight still. Switch on my laptop nd stare at th screen. Is there really anyone I can talk to ? & perhaps I have problems with emotions. Frustrated with myself. Crashing down. I think about them till my head hurts from spinning nd I feel empty. Then back to sleep thinking everything's fine. But no, it doesn't work that way. How depressing. Like a song playing on repeat. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes.

My different facades. Bottle it up, laugh, smile nd move on.

That's some hot stuff.

2008-03-01T10:37:00.007+08:00

Soup Spoon with Jaslyn, Beefy nd Syy at Paragon yesterday night. Snapple's Kiwi Strawberry is love !

We headed off to th Esplanade. Did some catching up with each other. Though it was just a quick get-together, I'm really glad.

Supper at 24hour. Char Kway Tiao nd Bundung ! That's about th end of leap day, February 29th.

On a short-term break.

2008-02-29T11:35:00.006+08:00

Last ppr yesterday morning, a rush of people getting cabs. About 30 mins late for exam, but managed to catch up a little. Haha. Met them at Tampines mall for our lunch !

Soon wee drove a few of us to town after that. Settled at Wisma's Starbucks, nd I had my Blueberry Bagel with th cream cheese ! (:

We had our little talks about school nd everything random.

Samuel got me tempted, so we walked over to Fareast for Chippy's Fried Mars Bars ! It's srsly good :D Then we took a bus ride down to Clark Quay for a walk. Dinner at Lau Par Sat. Had satays, stingray, seafood fried rice nd fried you tiaos.

Guangming : NBCB.
Me : Whatttt. Diu leh ah !
Sammy & Soon Wee : -laughters.

& btw, that's Mr Sammy's silly hand in th snapshot. Hilarious cantokkien nonsense nd stuff like that. Trained home after. It's time to stop being silly. Hahaha.

Cravings for ice cream, anyone ?

2008-02-27T20:57:00.004+08:00

Boyf's over. My ds lite has this effing cute game with little bunnies :D He seems very intrigued by it. Haha !

Ob. Business Statistics. Macroeconomics. Marketing. Difficult pprs. Maybe I didn't do much revision that's why. How's it ? Made me walk out. Feeling ? Awful.

4 down, 1 more to go. Business Accountings tomorrow will be horrible as well. Supp pprs won't be a surprise. I've promised to get better results for year two.

I can't wait for Friday. School break, need lots of catching up nd al.

Anw, takeaways for dinner from school. Met Fai abang at th bus stop, asked if I went to th market. It was so embarrassing.

Rawrr.

Spin me a carousel.

2008-02-25T23:09:00.005+08:00

My childhood favourite. Yes, carousels. Those pretty lightings nd horses made me smile. It's not always I get to ride on one. Whirls of cheap joys. Can I experience it again ? I'd trade anything for that. I would like to. I would love to.

What I have now is a whirl of mess instead. Maybe it's me. Idk.

My favourite girl.

2008-02-25T22:57:00.003+08:00

"If dreams don't go th sweet way ;
If wished seem too empty to hold on to ;
If life is like a dry well ;
Remember, I won't let you fall but hold your hand through it (:"

Aloha. Yes, everythings should be alright now. Thnks for th late night talk we had.

Love built to last.

2008-02-24T16:35:00.005+08:00

For one, I was never selfish with my love. Another, I have my reasons for getting frustrated nd upset.

I wish we never had to hurt. Confusement. Headaches. A rush of emotions. Hush, that's enough of tears for now (:

So there, I've sent over those pictures. I don't owe you else alr, do I ? Lets take another step, hunn.

Hearts al over th world tonight.

2008-02-22T20:18:00.003+08:00

Watched 200 Pounds Beauty on th teevee. It's nice, I'll give it 3 out of 5 popcorns. But I still prefer Windstruck. My al time favourite. Haha ! Korean movies, tsk tsk.

Mogu Mogu.

2008-02-17T09:11:00.003+08:00

Brought boyf to Fareast Plaza to try th new japanese outlet there yesterday. Th bento sets were really cute ! Had Cheeky Chick nd Callie Pillar. But note that you'll be paying for th appeal rather than th proportion !

Be my valentine.

2008-02-15T18:54:00.014+08:00

Surprise surprise.

Took me time nd effort to fix up everything that is needed. An almost-perfect view from his home. Somehow th candles only lit up for a few seconds though.

We had our little supper up there at about 2am. Sushis nd salmon sashimi I bought earlier. Contentment.

Snapshots nd exchange of gifts in school with th girls. Thnks alot for th letter, chocolates nd big rose !

Boyf came to pick me up from school. We cabbed to town area, had high tea buffet at a japanese restaurant.

Caught 'Ps. I love you' at Th Cathay. So glad he booked it early (: Anw, th storyline was a little different from th book (which personally is much preferred), but it's seriously bittersweet.Then took prints at th Heeren nd cabbed to Harbourfront for SENTOSA !

A night picnic with a beautiful view. & we also had Coffee Bean's cheesecake nd junkfood. I really love it (:

Thnk you, my dear boyf, for making my day special.

Lovers at Starbucks.

2008-02-13T02:41:00.001+08:00

How can we resist th food nd beverages there ? Haha.

My preference : Ultimately Java Chip Frappe nd Mocha Frappe.

&& Blueberry Bagels at anytime, please ! (:

Bite. Bite. Bite.

Dollies out.

2008-02-12T00:38:00.002+08:00

So met up with my favourite girl for dinner yesterday at Tampines mall. Say hello to Elmo nd Cookie Monster :D

Chingchong lunar events.

2008-02-11T21:23:00.016+08:00

Gong hei fat choyyyy !

Steamboat with th famm at night's eve.

Went with boyf nd his famm for visiting on th first day. Lou hey-ed nd gambled cards with them. Blackjack, doubles nd indian poker.

Over at grandparents' house in Tiong Bahru for lunch on th second day. Daddy's cooking is delicious, I love his ko-lo-yok (sweet&sour meat) !

Met up with my favourite girl for shopping in th afternoon. Then trained down to Raffles Place, Syy joined us for KTV session till 11pm ! Woahwoahwoah :D Anw, we ordered pizzas for dinner. It was seriously good stuff.

Sunday morning at church. Met Warren nd his famm after that, had our lunch at his relative's place.

Went over to Johor Bahru to visit his uncle's famm for buffet dinner. Such a big bungalow house, I would love to live in one of those too. Got to see close-up fireworks nd firecrackers at their place.

Huat ah huat.

That's hot.

2008-02-04T16:16:00.002+08:00

Vintage :

1. Of or relating to a vintage.
2. Old-fashioned or obsolete.
3. Characterized by excellence and enduring appeal; classic.
4. The high quality of a past time.

Beaute :

1. In french, for beauty.
2. For one that is beautiful.
3. A quality that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction.
3. An outstanding example of its kind.

Th girl who loves, nd loved.

2008-01-01T00:00:00.001+08:00

Natalie Erika
24th October
Temasek Polytechnic Business

Facades :
Pretty much an introvert. Not a social butterfly. Still approachable though. I've a short attention span at times. Low self-esteem. Somewhat a perfectionist. Paranoid on issues. Hates disappointments. Indecisive on matters. Can be very lazy. A habit of always being late.

Daily dosage :
Strawberry Kiwi Snapple drink. Junkfood. Eyecandies.

Randoms :
Yes, I like random stuff. I'm amused easily. I've a huge crush on flowers, especially roses. I don't save moolahs. I'm always broke. Binge like mad. Into makeups. Interested in photography. High fashion on runways. & I fancy people-watching. Hotttt stuffs.

Others, which I wouldn't elaborate further. Ask me about it.